Who is the cooler Jehovah’s Witness?
The answer of course is Prince. Prince is the coolest Jehovah’s Witness of all time. But anyone I would put up against him is no match for his coolness. So while neither Ja Rule nor Lark Voorhies are the epitome of cool, I think they’re a fair matchup.
Ja Rule a.k.a. Jeffrey Atkins was born and raised as a Jehovah’s Witness, but it seems is no longer practicing. He is a Leap Year baby, born on February 29th. That’s hip. As a rap artist he has released 7 albums and sold over 20 million albums worldwide. Not bad for an 8-year-old. As an actor he has appeared in multiple films including The Fast and the Furious, Scary Movie 3, and Shall We Dance(?). He founded a non-profit that helps inner-city youth. Pretty cool. Maybe he’s still got some of those J-Dub values in him. Oh and he’s homophobic. He also has an ongoing feud with rapper 50 Cent. You know you’ve arrived in the world when you can do battle with a fellow hardcore rapper.
We all know Lark Voorhies as Lisa Turtle, the rich, sassy, love interest of Screech Powers on Saved by the Bell. Sure she was no Kelly Kapowski (Tiffani-Amber Thiessen), but she was still hot, and she was always up on the latest fashion trends. Lisa Turtle was meant to be caucasian or Jewish, but Lark was so cool in her audition that she beat out all the other girls. Lark dated cool kid Zack Morris (Mark-Paul Gosselaar) in real life during production of SBTB and was engaged to Martin Lawrence for a time (Is that cool or not? I don’t know. I’m sure it was pre-Big Momma’s House/Roscoe Jenkins). Lark was named after a character in the movie Cool Breeze. You can’t get much cooler than that. She has also been referenced in rap songs by Ludacris and Asher Roth. Due to her religious beliefs Lark refused to do a sex scene on The Bold and the Beautiful and was released from her contract. Soon after she appeared in How High. Oh Miss Turtle.
I’m holding out for Prince to come knocking on my door.
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Tags: Ja Rule, Lark Voorhies, Lisa Turtle
After reading “Confessions of a Video Vixen” there was no way I could vote for Ja Rule….
Yeah, I think just about anyone is cooler than Ja Rule. He’s the worst dude from the worst period of hip hop.
Plus I’m a huge Saved By The Bell fan and Lisa is probably the easiest to like of the group. The worst thing she ever did was date Jesse’s step brother Eric.
I have to vote for Lark on this one since back when I was a Wasatch Warrior it is rumored that I was a member of a certain Saved By The Bell Gang. Yes, my mother is so proud.
I heard that Venus and Serena Williams are Jehovah’s Witness. I vote for them if that is true.
Lisa Turtle will always be cool!
Hip hop being the essense of cool. I have to use that as my frame of reference. Going off of hip hop credibility, I think Lark still wins. How High is a classic. For me it doesn’t get much better than Redman and Method Man. To me, Ja is still a wannabe DMX, and 50 murdered his career. I don’t like Fif, so it is bad when he is ending you.
Was there a SBTB marathon on recently?
[...] Who is the cooler Jehovah’s Witness? Ja Rule or Lark Voorhies? 58% of you chose Lark over Ja. Lark Voorhies definitely has more street cred. I wonder if she goes door to door with the Watchtower. [...]